Sun, May 28, 2017
Text Size

 

"Café Mama helps mothers achieve their breastfeeding goals and be happy, confident, caring and connected."

You kinda feel alone in this whole mothering thing.

You love your baby, you love being a mom and you are exhausted and overwhelmed. Breastfeeding causes you to doubt yourself. You are responsible for keeping this little human alive, but is your milk really good enough? You never feel like you're doing a good job.

You worry. Maybe you are also depressed and anxious. It's a huge effort trying to get the baby out of the house, so some days you don't even try.  Meanwhile, it seems every other mom you see or meet has it all together. Challenges keep popping up and it's your job to avoid them or blast through them - sometimes it's everything at once and you collapse crying.

Being a mom is amazing, but frequently, it really sucks and nobody gets that. 

You've googled, read books and self-diagnosed what your breastfeeding problems are, what your baby is doing and why you aren't happy. Not that you know what to do about it. You've got your old friends, your online friends, your husband or partner, maybe even your mom and dad. They love you. Yet, they are always saying the wrong things and coming between you and your baby. They don't understand what it's like. You love this baby so much.

Something is driving you and you can't give up. 

You've spent a ton of time and/or money on lactation consultants, or wish you did, and while things are better, breastfeeding still isn't easy and effortless. If you are anxious or depressed, therapy keeps you functioning on some level, but you are finding that mothering is not something anyone can cheer you through with "positive affirmations" "accountability" and "little goals." Googling your problem brings up your worst fears. Asking questions in online groups has resulted in some answers but an equal amount of jealousy and pain as you see radiant moms and babies laughing and enjoying life. And your old friends don't get "it." They think you can just get a baby sitter and still party with them. 

The problem is you are searching for something that you don't even know exists.

Café Mama offers you a place to meet friends who are also overwhelmed with a baby, just your baby's age. Friends who will listen, commiserate and who won't say unhelpful stuff or try to fix things.  

- A place with timely and on-going breastfeeding coaching and mothering help from someone with professional and personal experience.  

- A place where you can get a cup of tea and breastfeeding help in your pajamas and mom bun.

- A place where you can vent about breastfeeding, your exhaustion, your mother, your husband and how hard it is. And when you are done venting, celebrate the beauty of your baby and all the amazing things like your baby's snuggling, smiling, rolls of fat and pooping.

Café Mama has everything a mother needs.

Friends, comfy chairs, tea, coffee, water, snacks, a super clean bathroom and changing tables. We have a baby scale, diapers and wipes, snacks, pillows, burp cloths, a clean, confined play area, toys and books. We have a lending library of books and dvds. We have groups, events, classes and workshops. Most importantly, we have professionals with personal and professional experience in breastfeeding and mothering who listen and offer appropriate guidance for you and your family, when you need it.

You may have questions. Here are ones we answer frequently.

What is Café Mama? 

Café Mama is a flexible event space in New Baby New Paltz. The space is open when the store is open and also for special events outside of the store hours. Our mission is for friendship, learning & encouragement. It’s a place that embraces mothers and mothering. 

But, what is it? 

It's a place you can attend groups and events. You can also stop by if you need to feed, change a diaper or use the bathroom. 

We have 5 groups and a Breastfeeding Clinic every week. Expect about 6-10 moms with similar age babies. Groups with younger babies focus on you and your needs. Cruiser's and mixed-age groups include parent & baby socializing and baby activities. You can drop in - you don't need a reservation. It's OK if you are late and you can leave early if you need to. We offer weekly groups because moms need consistent ongoing support.

Do you serve food? 

We have a free tea and coffee bar, water, and snacks. We have nuts, bars and cookies you can purchase and you can also bring food in.

Who is it for? 

Mostly moms but all parents are welcome. It doesn't matter how you feed or diaper your baby or how you gave birth. You are welcome!

Are Dads welcome?

Dads, Grandparents, Nannies, are welcome at Cruiser's and All Ages play groups and family events. The New Mother's Social Circle is for "people identifying as mothers" only. The Breastfeeding Circle is open to anyone who is nursing, breastfeeding, chestfeeding or breastmilk feeding.

Can I come in my pajamas?

You really can come in your pajamas, unshowered, and nobody make fun of you. In fact, the other mamas will celebrate you getting out of the house!

Are people nice?

Yes, they are! "Mean girls," teasing, taunting and shunning are not allowed. Groups are facilitated and the conversation flows. Moms make great friendships that last.

Are there any underlying beliefs or parenting styles?

We believe in kind and respectful family relationships. We expect that you treat your baby and others with respect and kindness.

People of all ages, nationalities, races, and religions are welcome. LGBTQ, surrogate, foster and adoptive families are welcome.

You know your baby best and you know what works for your family. You can take what works for you and leave the rest.  

Is there a charge?

Your first group is free and then it's just $5 per group or by membership. Payment can be made by cash, check, credit card or paypal. 

Why is there a fee?

While we realize that “Free” is an option, we have expenses to run Café Mama. We looked at many options including not-for-profit, 501C-3 and agency-based like Baby Café. None of those offer the flexibility that self-funding does. We used to offer a free group and moms insisted on paying for the tremendous support they received.

What do I get with Membership?

You get quite a bit! 

     
 

Café Mama Membership

      Café Mama Unlimited Premium   Membership

One time purchase - you don’t have to remember your wallet

                    ✓

                 ✓

Unlimited Mother Circles

                    ✓

                 ✓

Mom’s Night Out Events for fun, relaxation and friendship

                   ✓

                 ✓

New Baby News - A short, sweet article about mothering, events & specials

                  ✓ 

                 ✓

10% off all NBNP purchases

 

                 ✓

$10 NBNP Baby Bucks for every $150 spent

 

                 ✓

50% off all Office Lactation Consultations with Donna or $10 off any Home Visit. 

 

                 ✓

Free Bra Fitting (& remember you get 10% off your purchase)

 

                 ✓

Quarterly Repatterning Workshops to help you thrive

 

                 ✓

Special Perks from New Baby New Paltz Partners

                    ✓
 

$150/year

$195/year

 

When you join Café Mama you can expect to:

  • Enjoy breastfeeding and meet your breastfeeding goals

  • Make good friends for you and your baby

  • Ask questions and get appropriate answers 

  • Share information that you find helpful and useful

  • Receive heartfelt support from people you care about

  • Feel like a good mom

Marcia Kellogg shares her experience:

"I didn't have a mother's group when my first was a baby. There were a lot more feelings of loneliness and anxiety. I often felt like I was doing something wrong or that he was doing something wrong. I knew I didn't need to call the doctor, but not knowing anyone who could answer questions about what he was doing caused a lot of stress and anxiety. 

 

I was bored. Especially when he was really tiny. I could read or talk but there wasn't anything I could really DO with him.  I didn't have the support to work through nursing questions. He just weaned at 3 weeks and that was that. There was no one saying "If you try 'this' or 'this', you can work things out and keep nursing."

 

With my second, I found Donna had a really nice, safe place where I could get answers and find out what other mothers' experiences were. I was able to vent and meet mom friends. I learned so much. I learned that in a nursing relationship, there's no deadline. I learned about carseat issues: that at 23 pounds you don't have to turn the baby forward facing.

 

It gave me something to look forward to, so I was more likely to get dressed and go "do something." With my first, I used to stay in my pajamas all day because there was not much point in moving my body out of my home. Coming to the Mother's Circle benefitted my mental health. And when you are around people and feel good, your physical health also improves.

 

The Mother's Circle is a casual, semiprivate meeting where everyone is expected to say who they are. I really got to know the other people and I felt safe enough that my baby could lay on the floor with them and I could be alone in the bathroom. Coming weekly was a really convenient way to foster friendships. When I had a sensitive subject I could tag off someone else's mentioning it and say, "Me too!" We could commiserate and not feel alone. It's a very welcoming and safe place to talk about mothering. There is always someone there who has just been through what you are going through, or is going thru the same thing. There is a camaraderie in knowing I am not alone - I don't have to face parenting and life in a constant state of confusion and anxiety. It helped most when my milk supply dropped during ovulation. I was encouraged and didn't just quit and say, "Nursing didn't work."

 

The group helped me with being more patient and understanding.  I could see some children walking at 10 mo and others at 15 months, and realize both are normal. Children have different skills and understanding. It's easier to not compare within you see so many differences among all the children. I could see how other people handle children who are "attached." Kids learn how to socialize with other kids while mothers stay close. 

 

Donna is very informative and inclusive, offering lots of information around what and why choices are made. She never makes someone feel wrong with their choices. She's clear and honest in what she sees. There's not a lot of sugar coating but she's kind, warm and thorough, not blunt and cold. She has a wealth of knowledge which has helped me make my own decisions and feel confident doing it the way I feel is the right way.

 

As a mother of a two year old, I'm really grateful for the confidence I have now. Going week-to-week and hearing someone else say "Maybe you should get that checked?" or "I don't think you have to worry about that." gave me confidence in trusting my inner voice. I am more assertive and confident now with people who don't parent like me, or who criticize me. 

 

I'm happy about the friendships I've made. I see people at the supermarket and around town and have a background when I talk with them. I am in a real community.

You will be able to purchase a membership at 5 pm EST on Monday February 20, 2017.

Café Mama Login

Please Register for an Invitation.

* indicates required