We are here for you during the best, most amazing time of your life.
And you are wandering around Target and the mall, working or hanging out at home, wondering where all the good mama friends are.
Being a mama is magical. You know that and we know that.
Babies help you make oxytocin and that hormone makes everything feel amazing. But to reduce it to oxytocin is to minimize what you just did. You grew a human being with your body.
Say that again.
Your BODY, that never measured up, in any way, in your life, just grew a human being!!! And if breastfeeding is working, you are still growing that baby or child with your magic milk.
And more magical than that, your baby LOVES you. Bigger than that, YOU are the center of their world. You are the sunrise and sunset, the beginning and the end, the alpha and omega or this little human's life. And for the next few years, it's just going to get bigger and better! Nobody loves more intensely than children.
But this is the toughest job in the world, and if you try to do this solo, you will be sooo.... unhappy.
It's OK to be unhappy. Raising a baby or child comes with constant changes and some downright unfairnesses. It's exhausting. It brings up all your bad memories. It can bring out the worst in your birth family and partner. You may be noticing the bloom is off the rose of your marriage. You may be feeling postpartum and weepy. Your body may make you cry in the way it looks, or feels.
I wish I could tell you that all that bad stuff will just go away. It usually does, but sometimes it gets worse. If it's getting worse, you should know that you can get help to make things better.
Stop and think a minute. Are you more happy or more unhappy. If unhappiness is winning, it's time for some positive changes, and you can't do this alone.
First. Do you even remember who you are?
Take a pause right now and remember those things.
Go ahead, roll your eyes in an impersonation of your best 15 year-old self.
There are some parts of reclaiming your old life that you will need help with.
If you feel more than the baby blues, it may be postpartum depression or anxiety. Studies show that social support and exercise are key for maternal well-being. Women are meant to be in community. We need friends and all of us need certain kinds of friends. I know as well as anyone how overwhelming it is, especially if you feel depressed, to add "making friends" to your to-do list.
Which is why I've done all the "heavy lifting" for you.
If you are feeling the need to reclaim your SELF and make some friends, our compassionate and loving community of mamas (and mamas-to-be!) is waiting for you. We have something nearly every day and in all kinds of formats from online and live support groups to classes and events.
We are here so you can get encouragement and inspiration, learn lots of mama and baby tips and tricks, and most of all, to find your new self.
My love to you and your family!